The #1 Query Mistake (It’s Not What You Think)
Most writers assume the biggest query mistake is something small — a typo, a formatting slip, or forgetting to paste the first pages. And sure, those things matter, but they’re not what makes an agent stop reading.
The mistake that sinks more queries than anything else? Starting with backstory instead of hook.
Why Backstory Hurts Your Query
When an agent opens your query, they don’t want to wade through three paragraphs of your main character’s childhood trauma before we know the premise.
Backstory slows everything down. It buries your story’s energy under context the reader hasn’t earned yet. By the time you get to the actual plot, the tension is gone — and so is the agent’s attention.
What To Do Instead
👉 Lead with tension. Open with the conflict, the stakes, the moment your main character’s life changes. The best queries drop us straight into the beating heart of the story.
Think of it this way: if you had 30 seconds in an elevator with an editor, would you start with “Ever since she was a little girl…”? Or would you cut straight to the part where something life-shattering is about to happen?
Common Red Flags
“Ever since…” openings that linger in the past.
Trauma dumps before we even know the premise.
Worldbuilding explanations that overshadow character stakes.
These aren’t just weak choices — they signal to an agent that the manuscript itself might start too slow.
A Stronger Alternative
Instead of:
Ever since she was a little girl, Clara dreamed of leaving her small town…
Try:
When Clara discovers her father’s name on a list of missing persons, she’s forced to choose between protecting her family’s secrets and exposing them to the world.
See the difference? One meanders. The other cracks open tension immediately.
Final Thoughts
The #1 query mistake is always structural. If your query starts with backstory, it tells us your book might too. Lead with tension, and you’ll have an agent leaning forward instead of skimming.
✨ Want to know if your query actually works?
I offer personalized query reviews — I’ll mark up your letter, explain what agents look for, and help you open with tension instead of backstory. You can book one today.